how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
