your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize