and you said cock pushups were impossible
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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