kristin has been a bad kristin
someone owes me an orgasm
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
