I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I love you. Go after that dick
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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