Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Randomize