So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Randomize
