I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Randomize
