glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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