i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
