just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Randomize
