What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize