just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
