I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
