The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
