your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I'm gonna fight the coyote
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
