I feel like I'm in dance class right now
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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