hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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