I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
