My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Randomize
