I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
