Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
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