i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Small penises have feelings too.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
