He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize