Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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