:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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