Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
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