I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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