The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
