Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Can I color on your dick again?
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
