what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
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