Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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