I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
3 2 1 whiskey
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
