It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize