if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Randomize
