His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
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