Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Randomize
