Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize
