I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
