is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
