This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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