i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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