If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
