I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
You have to summon your inner elephant
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Randomize
