i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
You left your phone here
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