He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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