I must be too annoying 4 u.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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