im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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