Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Randomize
