my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
