so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
