i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
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